"My Thoughts are Racing"

My thoughts are racing,

cause time has too.

Its hard for me,

to express to you.

The things I've learned,

and the things I've seen.

And the things I've felt,

because of these.

-Elder Austin Gene Goff

   I have felt so many feelings in the last couple three weeks.  I'm finding myself more and more trying to put into words the things I am feeling.  To me its as an old companion expressed before he left to go home, "In the last transfer of your mission you feel every emotion possible."  I have come to find out that is completely true.  I have felt so many things that I have such a hard time expressing to the people around me, or even to my family at home through my weekly e-mails. 

   I feel like Moroni in the Book of Ether from the Book of Mormon when he says, "Thou hast also made our words powerful and great, even that we cannot write them; wherefore, when we write we behold our weakness, and stumble because of the placing of our words; and I fear lest the Gentiles shall mock at our words.

   And when I had said this, the Lord spake unto me, saying: Fools mock, but they shall mourn; and my grace is sufficient for the meek, that they shall take no advantage of your weakness."

   This verse of scripture fits the way I feel.  When I speak by the spirit as a missionary I feel powerful and great.  That I am going to miss.  The feelings I feel now are powerful and great, things that I cannot express.  That's why I am struggling to put my feelings that I feel into words that can truly express my thoughts and feelings.  I am convinced there are not words which could do such a thing.  It's impossible to come up with words or vocabulary that would help someone understand what a missionary feels at the end of their service.  So my humble poem will have to suffice.

Watch...And Learn

Many people are visual learners, meaning they learn by seeing.  I believe to a degree we all learn visually.  We can "watch and learn" from the people around us.  It's interesting to me how by just watching someone we can learn things.  We can learn things from them, and we can learn things about them. 
In the last week I have been able to work closely with some great people who I love and adore.  People who I have associated with for my entire mission, but have never been able to be around for long periods of time.  I have learned so much about them and from them, just by simply watching, listening and trying to duplicate their actions to become a better person.

We do that with the life of Jesus Christ all the time right?  We visualize his life and his mission.  We can see his perfect example for exactly what it is; Perfect.  We want to be able to help others, and we of course would like to become more like him as well.  So we do out best to follow his teachings.  To become better.  As Christmas day approaches much quicker than I had anticipated and I'm sure many of you feel the same, I pray that we will be able to learn from our Great Master, even Jesus Chirst.  He has truely carried our griefs and sorrow.  We are forever indebted to him.  We have much to be thankful for this Chirstmas season.  Be joyful and know that God is with you and he listens.  Learn from him, learn from those around you..BECOME.  Watch and Learn.

My Blog

Having this blog has been good for me.  I have been able to write some of my feelings.  My thoughts, and been able to actually know about people reading it.  I hope that as I share my thoughts and feelings that everyone who reads it will be able to get something out of it.  I had someone tell me they had read some of my blogs, and it made me really think.  Am I writing things that will help others, or am I writing things that will help me.  If there is a particular subject you would like me to write about feel free to ask.  I'll try to write about it.  I am on here to help other people.  Not to just write because I was asked to.  I want it to be good for everyone.  Love, Elder Goff