"My Thoughts are Racing"

My thoughts are racing,

cause time has too.

Its hard for me,

to express to you.

The things I've learned,

and the things I've seen.

And the things I've felt,

because of these.

-Elder Austin Gene Goff

   I have felt so many feelings in the last couple three weeks.  I'm finding myself more and more trying to put into words the things I am feeling.  To me its as an old companion expressed before he left to go home, "In the last transfer of your mission you feel every emotion possible."  I have come to find out that is completely true.  I have felt so many things that I have such a hard time expressing to the people around me, or even to my family at home through my weekly e-mails. 

   I feel like Moroni in the Book of Ether from the Book of Mormon when he says, "Thou hast also made our words powerful and great, even that we cannot write them; wherefore, when we write we behold our weakness, and stumble because of the placing of our words; and I fear lest the Gentiles shall mock at our words.

   And when I had said this, the Lord spake unto me, saying: Fools mock, but they shall mourn; and my grace is sufficient for the meek, that they shall take no advantage of your weakness."

   This verse of scripture fits the way I feel.  When I speak by the spirit as a missionary I feel powerful and great.  That I am going to miss.  The feelings I feel now are powerful and great, things that I cannot express.  That's why I am struggling to put my feelings that I feel into words that can truly express my thoughts and feelings.  I am convinced there are not words which could do such a thing.  It's impossible to come up with words or vocabulary that would help someone understand what a missionary feels at the end of their service.  So my humble poem will have to suffice.